Minions of the Monster Master

Kickstart This!

2012-02-15T08:29:00.004-05:00

As mentioned in the last podcast, Gunship: First Strike is raising money on Kickstarter. This is a great opportunity to get a pre-order of the game, plus possible bonus content!

While you are there (but AFTER you help Kickstart Gunship!), check out OOTS or this gem of a settlers game.

Episode 44; Deathwatch, A Stony Sleep pt. 2

2012-01-30T00:49:00.000-05:00

Episode: iTunes
Episode: Non-iTunes

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, T-Bone, Chick-o-Sticks, Biscuit, Mystery Meat, Americano

Show Notes:

More Deathwatch reinforcements arrive as the team investigates the black market Xeno-tech trade as well as a mysterious underwater city. The former is being run by a nefarious heretic who is armed with Xenos weaponry and whose body is heavily augmented by Xenos artifacts. The latter points to a swell of seismic activity in the region, and hints to being the location of the impostor Space Marines from the previous adventure.

Enjoy!

Episode 43; Deathwatch, A Stony Sleep pt. 1

2012-01-07T10:16:00.002-05:00

Episode: iTunes
Episode: Non-iTunes

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, T-Bone, and Chick-o-Sticks

Show Notes:

Reviews from iTunes
Gyro's emotional tirade
Duck Sauce's lack of NPC dodges
Official Apology to Ralnai
Tasting a new bourbon; Jim Beam Devil's Cut
New podcast mascot; Litterbox
Homemade Tandori Chicken
The Minions' Holiday Feast of Foods
On to the actual play...

This session continues the adventures of the Deathwatch marines as they embark upon a new chapter called the Stony Sleep. It's usually the 'big group' but even down three men we still roll as the Emperor's Finest putting power armored boot to heretic arse.

Enjoy!

A Minions Carol

2011-12-23T12:01:00.001-05:00

Twas the night before Christmas
and on the Podcast
Minions gathered 'round the table
For a Christmas-eve bash

T-Bone spoke in a voice
Ranging from mumbles to a shout
“I hope Santa brings me time
to game and hang out.”

“So come on, people, focus!
That would bring me good cheer.
No, Screw it, what I want
Is a case of good beer.”

The sage-like Duck Sauce leaned back
and he thought for a while
“Some bourbon would be better
he said with a smile.”

He told an off-color joke,
which gave him a laugh.
Then he checked the mic
“Is this on? Oh Crap!”

Then Gyro spoke up
In a booming-loud voice.
“A Skyrim miniatures game
would be my gift of choice.”

“Or a Skyrim RPG,
that would be great!
I'll drink Duck Sauce's Bourbon
and the GM I'll berate.”

Chico Sticks gave a smile
and said with no gloss
“A loud voice would
help me game 'like a boss'”

Americano spoke up
in a voice so sarcastic,
"Every electronic device in
the world would be fantastic."

Said Mystery Meat
just one word “Indeed.”
In deep contemplation
while there in his seat.

“Oh F in the A!”
said Biscuit with glee.
"Will Santa bring me a sketchbook?
That's just what I need.”

“Then we'd better shut down."
Ole' T-Bone said.
"It's a long drive home
Must get ready for bed.”

“So that Santa can come,
We sure don't want to miss it.
To our listeners out there
HAVE A MERRY MINIONS CHRISTMAS!”

Episodic Triple Shot

2011-12-20T00:29:00.001-05:00

There are no less than three new episodes up for grabs as we speak. Three! Gyro is slacking on his 'new episode' posts, sure, but the Minions are also setting new records in cranking out content. Below are the briefest show notes ever. Enjoy!

Episodes: iTunes
Episodes: Non-iTunes

Episode 40: Deathwatch, the Price of Hubris part three. Our Space Marines trade their loincloths back in for their more traditional power armor and enjoy a celebratory feast! Nothing bad ever happens at a feast. Right?

Episode 41: Fiasco, the Zoo. Welcome to the Brookmarket Zoo, these are your tour guides this evening; the head custodian, the chairman of the board, and a seal trainer! Nothing bad ever happens when you grow illegal substances in the Australian Excursion exhibit. Right?

Episode 42: The Tainted World, character creation. Gearing up for 2012's next big FATE romp our hosts sit down and make some characters. Nothing bad can happen when characters are created. Right?

Meatball & the D20 Beholder of the Perpetual Catacombs

2011-12-01T12:50:00.003-05:00

In remembrance of a sorely missed and not soon forgotten minion,

BJ “Meatball” Dybus

With the D20 Beholder finally slain a much grander adventure awaits you.

Book 3, Episode Two: World Creation Conclusion

2011-11-20T08:45:00.002-05:00

Episode: iTunes
Episode: Non-iTunes

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, and Clambake

Show Notes:

The third season of the podcast continues. In another mid-week game we conclude the new (to us) RPG Microscope world creation. Stick a fork in the Tainted World, because this setting is done. It's a short list of hosts this time around, but the roleplaying and world creation doesn't suffer for it in the least.

Enjoy!

Book 3, Episode One: Microscope RPG

2011-11-11T13:08:00.005-05:00

Episode: iTunes
Episode: Non-iTunes

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Flounder, Clambake, and Biscuit

Show Notes:

Welcome to the third season of the podcast! In this mid-week game we look at the new RPG out there Microscope and use it for world creation that might serve us later in a FATE campaign. We introduce a new host, bring back an old one, and even change our music intro. Not only that, but this was recorded just this past Wednesday, so this may be the fastest session-to-listener episode ever. Enjoy!

Second Anniversary and the Third Season

2011-11-10T08:34:00.003-05:00

Both events, the third season of the podcast, as well as our second year anniversary, crept up on us like a ninja in the night, stabbing us in the necks!

So, Halloween marks the show's beginning and we were all surprised after last episode that another one was upon us. So yeah, two years. Wow. Of course another season is in order, so the last Deathwatch episode you heard was the end of season two. Just last night we recorded an impromptu world creation session of Microscope, so look for that to kick off season three. We're working on a new intro as well.

Oh, and we added a new host to boot.

Episode 37; Deathwatch v2.0, Game Four

2011-10-28T21:06:00.000-04:00

Episode 37: Even More Deathwatch!
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Gyro, Biscuit, T-Bone, Chick-o-Sticks, Mystery Meat, Americano, and Duck Sauce

The Price of Hubris adventure continues as the Deathwatch Marines delve deeper into mystery and intrigue (and a good deal of gun play) among the natives.

Mystery Meat & Franz and Steen's Monster

2011-10-15T19:05:00.004-04:00

Ever since they were children Franz and Steen Eevahldoer dreamt they would hit it big in the evil alchemist community. Thirty years later Steen's head is floating magically in a jar, a story for a later time, and his brother Franz is in the middle of being ripped apart by their latest creation. The world is a funny place, ya know? One minute your stitching together a random assortment of orc bits and serving up a lightning-defibrillated heartbeat to said meat pile and the next minute that soulless bastard is going ape-shit over a questionable and over-enthused hug from the beasties own creator. Welcome to the family indeed. After tearing into and snarfing down some of the fleshy appetizer the creature is ready for the main course and the nearby village is looking quite suitable for the part.

Its a good thing Mystery Meat just happened to be strolling through the area after a successful exorcism of an evil haunted hayride. The problem with exorcisms is they generally don't meet your bloodlust quota as far as monumental battles go. Sure, there is plenty of projectile vomiting on hand but that is all clean-up and no fun. Luckily for Mystery Meat Mr. Orc-enstein just stepped into line. With his trusted trident at his side he traded a few well placed blows with the beast. Eventually widdling the monster down by tearing open his stitchings until only the monster's reanimated head remained, all the while chomping and snarling at Mystery Meat's fingers as he lifted it up by the small tuft of hair atop it's scalp.

Mystery Meat strolled out of town looking forward to the next adventure that will inevitably come along but not before making a well placed shot with the monster's head from the free throw line right into Steen's jar.

- Enjoy

Americano & the Tale of Headless Jack

2011-10-03T22:30:00.007-04:00

It is with caution I urge to those that hear the Tale of Headless Jack. This is not the oft-heard story of a tormented soul looking to find his long lost head but the grimoire of a murderous harvester of souls. The tale goes - that before his death Jack was a farmer whose fields would yield the most abundant crops. His green thumb knew no bounds and drew the attention of jealous and bitter villagers in the area. They yearned to know why his harvest was always so successful when their crops were dying of drought and what little would grow was unhealthy and provided no sustinance.

The years had passed and Jack's fortune never wavered while the nearby fields only produced nutrient-starved dirt and rocks. The farmers that grew far too curious and disgruntled would steal onto Jack's land never to return. This mystery would continue through the seasons and those that dared to step into the lush fields continued to vanish until the remaining villagers had enough. They congregated and formed a torch wielding, anger fueled mob to raid Jack's homestead. What the mob discovered was a horror far grizzlier than they had ever dreamed.

The enraged mob gathered at Jack's front door and demanded he show himself. To their dismay he never came. No movement could be seen within his ram-shackled dwelling. The more daring members of the group entered the domicile to find nobody home. They soon decided that their endeavor should bear some fruit as they began to pillage the home and nearby fields. Those starving of hunger began gathering what produce they could fit into their arms and clothing. Dirtied and work-hardened hands dug into the earth ripping strong and fertile roots from the soil. They drank from the moisture that dripped from the stalks but quickly spat it out. In the darkness they could not see that the juices that filled their throats was thick with blood. They did not see that the rocks and clods of mud that were carelessly thrown aside were actually the decomposed remains of the numerous bodies that had been buried about the fields. That night the harvest moon was audience to a raucous chorus of blood curdling screams and howling death rattles.

While their brothers and sisters choked on the foul fluids they had ingested the villagers that chose to raid Jack's shacks and sheds were frozen stiff with fear at the sight before them, silent screams of horror emblazoned across their faces. Headless corpses toppled from the sheds, decapitated bodies hung from the rafters of the barn, and the silos... those unfortunate enough to witness the innards of the silos were the first to fall. They had no time to scream as a long nimble blade sliced through the night air. The solid thud of bodies came first followed by the soft bounce of smaller objects as they came to rest in the hay below. The straggling villagers were picked off one by one as the stronger few gathered together in the clearing of the pumpkin patch. They stood their ground as a lanky and unkept looking farmer stood before them. Blood spattered all over his form. An evil twisted grin cracked in his leathery face. A slick scythe brandished in his grasp. Jack didn't take well to trespassers. That was apparent. The morning harvest was delayed and someone was going to pay.

He pulled his scythe tight to his shoulder and brought it down in a clearing sweep. The farmers' courage faltered as they winced in wait for the attack. But. The attack that did not come. They looked back at their attacker to find a formidable figure wielding a massive hammer in front of them fending off the murder-crazed Jack. While Jack was quick and nimble, our hero, Americano, was quicker. He did not move his lackadaisical-stance as he swung his hammer swatting away each strike of the scythe. Jack never knew such an enemy and lost his composure and soon his defensive strategy. He stepped in for a fatal attack but was caught off guard as the enormous head of Americano's hammer struck the wind from his gut. Jack fell to the ground gasping for air. He looked up at his foe to find the morning sun blinding his already watering eyes. He had no chance to make a witty quip as the silhouette of the hammer crushed his skull into the ground.

The surviving villagers cheered and jeered at this mysterious hero. Their lives were spared and while the life that was spared may have a hard road ahead they knew that they would have the chance to see it. The celebration was motioned to continue at the local tavern but Americano did not follow. He stood vigil over Jack's lifeless body. The villagers reluctantly left their savior in that field.

At sunset Americano watched as the pumpkins in the surrounding field illuminated from within. Demonic and morbid faces began to cut away from the orange exteriors. The light within flickered in the openings as the face on the pumpkins writhed about in silent agony. Jack's body slowly sank into the ground disappearing beneath the eerie glow of the jack o' lanterns. Moments later a mound of dirt and soil forced itself from the same spot in which Jack descended into hell. The loose soil fell away to reveal a headless figure standing before Americano. The now headless Jack bent down to fetch his trusty scythe. He then pulled a nearby pumpkin from the ground and placed it upon his shoulders. The glow of the flame in his new face set the mood for Jack as he jerked back his weapon and lunged forward at Americano. Americano stepped aside and swung his hammer down on Jack's "head". The living gourd shattered to pieces as Jack stumbled forward, headless again. However the blow did not kill Jack. He plucked another pumpkin from the patch and placed it too upon his shoulders.

Americano understood the battle ahead of him. Jack was planting the heads of his victims in this pumpkin patch. All around our hero was a bevy of new faces for Jack to pick from and he was going to put each and every one of them to use...

You will do well to avoid the killing fields of Headless Jack.

With his freshly wetted scythe he will attack.

He will take your head and plant it in his patch.

Your head he will wear to get his back.

Enjoy!

Episode 36; Deathwatch v2.0, Game Three

2011-09-24T11:28:00.002-04:00

Episode 36: More Deathwatch!
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Gyro, Biscuit, T-Bone, Chick-o-Sticks, Mystery Meat, Americano, and Duck Sauce

After wrapping up a successful mission against the Tyranids the Deathwatch team is dispatched on a more ambassadorial mission to bring the savage inhabitants of a distant world back into the fold of the Imperial family. Of course, it's what the planet contains in its mineral rich mines that the Imperium really wants. Oh, and there's been some mysterious murders and some crazy dinosaurs running around. Enjoy!

You Just Had to Enter!

2011-09-20T12:08:00.001-04:00

You may recall the recent contest we had, giving away a painted Deathwatch Space Marine. Maybe you don't recall it, which is why you didn't enter. Either way, the bottom line is that everyone who entered...won. It was that simple!

This blog, which really just accompanies the podcast itself, has 94 followers. If all 94 followers had entered we would be in serious trouble! As it turns out, four of you entered, we just happened to have four spare, unpainted Deathwatch Space Marines lying around, so all four came out winners.

I believe the mix turned out to be a Librarian with Force Sword and Power Fist, an Assault marine with Jump Pack, Chain-axe, and scoped Bolt pistol, a Devastator marine with a Plasma Cannon, and a Tactical marine (I think) kitted out appropriately, so who gets what exactly? I don't know, but the following winners will be contacted soon about where to ship these figs off to.

Eriochrome of the excellent Sons of Twilight blog
Tristan of the equally excellent GW Pertinent blog
Stewart, one of the hosts of Live by the Die, Die by the Die
Señor Vosovic, who I can't seem to link to any blog

So congratulations to all of you. We will try to post some WiP shots here on the blog so you can see how your marines are shaping up before they ship out. Until next time!

Episode 35: Fiasco Dragonslayers

2011-09-17T17:08:00.000-04:00

artwork © Wayne Reynolds

Episode 35: Fiasco Dragonslayers
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Gyro, Biscuit, and Duck Sauce

A Golem's rune of control is destroyed during an epic battle with a fire drake. A Summoner turns to older, darker magics hellbent on finding ultimate power. A Dwarf bounty hunter is on the trail of both, looking for revenge and to carve out a destiny of his own.

After wrapping up a fourth session of Warhammer Fantasy using the FATE rules, some of the hosts stuck around. With a little time on their hands the new standby and fast-becoming favorite RPG pick-up game Fiasco is broken out, this time with a new setting; fantasy.

Note: Keeping with the technical difficulty trend of last episode, we managed to not record the first thirty minutes and had to start over a second time.

Chick-O-Sticks & the Fire Lord's Three Mysterious Mistresses

2011-09-17T16:41:00.004-04:00

The grand halls of the Fire Lord's Castle are eerily quiet while the sun sets over the nearby mountains. Our hero, Chick-O-Sticks sneaks through the shadows of the over-heated fortress. You see, the realm of the Fire Lord is a harsh desert landscape where the thought of a single drop of water will cause a war. The curtain of nightfall doesn't help the heat in the least. A lesser man would be dying of heat stroke right about now but this daring rogue maintains his cool, pun intended. The reason for skulking about the lair of such an evil overlord? To acquire the ruler's sacred battle sword. For without it the Fire Lord has no power and these once lush lands will return to their former green glory.

It doesn't take long to locate the sword. Chick-O-Sticks spots the weapon at the end of lengthy unguarded corridor. Its his for the taking. As he nears the object of his affection he takes in the details of it's surroundings. It rests upon a duly lit pedestal in a large high-domed room with nary an inkling of a trap or defense. He nears the end of the passage. He is so close he can see his reflection framed within the pristine wetted edge of the blade. Still no guards, no ambush. There is no way it can be this easy. He reaches out to take the handle into his grasp. Then... he heard it. The whisper of a noise. It was gone as quick as it had came. He stood motionless, frozen in place. The sword's hilt a fraction of an inch from his finger tips. That noise. So queer that in this place, of all the sounds to hear, he hears the gasp of a sultry innocent giggle. A woman's laugh.

Chick-O-Sticks spots a miniscule sliver of light emanating from a nearby doorway. He turns from the pedestal and moves towards the opening. Kneeling and peering through the slight crack he is witness to a sight most men can only dream of. Three beautiful, scantily-clad, young women can be seen frolicking about a huge bedroom. Red curtains and satin sheets are draped about blocking too-good a portion of the view as the lovely ladies within engage in a heated battle of pillow tag. Chick-O-Sticks opens the door and disappears within.

8 minutes later...

Chick-O-Sticks has a bit of trouble locating his pants in the sea of tangled satin red sheets and under garments. The three mysterious mistresses lay on the bed fast asleep looking quite satisfied in their sexy slumber. Just as he manages to tug a restricted pant leg from under one of the lasses finely toned buttocks he feels the hot gust of breath at the back of his neck. He turns to the sight of a gargantuan rust bearded beast of a man wielding the sacred battle sword clenched tightly beneath his bleach-white knuckles. The look of intense rage emblazoned across his face is unmistakable. He is pissed. Without wasting a single moment Chick-O-Sticks bolts for the room's only exit left unblocked by this mountainous enemy, the terrace. He manages to vault over the balcony before a gust of wind on his naked back tells him that the swing of a sword just narrowly missed his spine. He plummets to the river below. The Fire Lord can be seen waving an angry fist down at the falling intruder. The mistresses tugging and pulling at their master's arms and beard. Begging for more from the stranger. Their bosoms heaving in impassioned rebellion. Their pouting lips clenched beneath a teasing bite...

Sorry.

Is it getting hot in here?

Anyways... ahem... phew.

Back to the story.

Chick-O-Sticks splashes heavily into the rough waters and swims to the nearest embankment. He recollects the course of events from this night. The thought of not retrieving the sword does not bother him. He knows that he will return to the Fire Lord's castle for more action. And after that he is going to attempt to steal the sacred battle sword...

Enjoy!

Episode 34: Deathwatch v2.0, Game Two

2011-09-14T10:22:00.001-04:00

Episode 34: Deathwatch v2.0, Game One
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Gyro, Biscuit, T-Bone, Americano, Chick-o-Sticks, and Duck Sauce

Our second game of Fantasy Flight's Deathwatch, concluding our planet-drop introductory mission. The squad has no less than four mission objectives to complete, will they be able to overcome chapter rivalries and learn to work together as a team to accomplish them?

The Mechanicus Magos is still missing dirtside, amidst a swarming Tyranid invasion. Boltgun kill-counters are still primed, awaiting for the proposed number of aliens sworn to die at the hands of the marines. An Imperial Guard commissar has been rescued, but getting the frail human off the planet alive is another task entirely, and finally, the data-core itself, the marines' primary objective, has yet to be recovered.

Note: Due to technical difficulties we only recorded a little less than the first two hours out of a five hour session.

Flounder & the Cultist Snakemen of Forgotten Rainforest

2011-09-04T19:04:00.005-04:00

Our hero Flounder awakens to find himself chained at each wrist to the ceiling of a darkened room. The flicker of flame from a torch stationed on the wall next to a closed door reveals that he is swinging freely a few feet above the floor. His surroundings seem to be of stone made long ago. He also notices that the stone beneath him is much darker. It appears to be stained heavily with blood. Flounder knows he must escape before his blood is the next to fall in this place.

With little effort Flounder first raises his knees to his chest and then extends his lower legs upwards placing his feet squarely on the ceiling above his head. Pulling firmly at his forearms he can feel the rusted cuffs digging into his wrists. The sensation is excruciating but he endures the pain as the stone begins to give. Broken rock and dust rains down as he drops to the ground before being ripped away from his free fall in a wild swing. The numbness in his left arm tells him that only the right chain let loose from its binding. The situation worsens as Flounder soon hears the shuffle of movement from outside the door.

The aged door creaks inward to reveal the silhouette of a large hooded figure wielding an ornate sword. The figure seems to be chanting in an ancient tongue to the blade but abruptly ceases the incantation and stands silently in the open doorway. During the eerie silence Flounder notices that behind the figure trails its massive tail. This isn't your average run-of-the-mill cultist. While studying this new foe he catches a glimpse of the scaled knuckles clenched around the hilt of the sword. Without warning the creature bursts from its trance and lunges fiercely at its swaying captive with edged metal raised for the kill.

Flounder reacts even quicker than his enemy and cracks the loose chain like a whip ensnaring the figure around its throat. The cultist flails back tightening the slack of captive and chain breaking the remaining connection of stone and metal at the ceiling. Both hero and foe hit the ground at the same time with a heavy thud on the dense stone below. Luckily the hero is the first to rise, his enemy writhing and hissing beneath its cloak. Flounder places a finalizing stomp into the creature's neck ending its life. He pulls the cowl of the robes back to reveal the head of an oversized snake. Unfazed he searches the corpse to find a ring of keys and removes his forced bracers. He pulls the sword from the snakeman's stiff death grip and exits into the dark corridor beyond the only door to his cell.

After some instinctive maze traversing Flounder follows the brightening light source and finds himself at the entrance to the ancient ruins of a lost race. The sunlight is blinding as he steps into the surrounding rainforest outside the dilapidated temple. An arrow narrowly misses his back as he turns to find another cloaked snakeman, drawing an arrow across the string of his bow, atop an enormous crumbling statue of a sacred serpentine titan. Even more of the creatures can be heard coming from the corridors within the ruins. A prompt slash of his sword brings the entrance down upon the exiting enemies, burying them in dirt and rubble, while a second slash deflects an incoming arrow. Yet another snakeman attacks from the nearby fauna only to meet cold steel at his throat. Flounder then vanishes into the trees of this forgotten rainforest as a hooded figure slithers after hissing an incantation into its sacrificial dagger. The serpent god will not be denied his offering...

Enjoy!

Winners, New Episodes, and Such

2011-08-29T20:30:00.001-04:00

Heya, just a quick post to let y'all know that episode #34 is finished and in the can. We also announced the winner of the "win a painted Deathwatch" miniature but with a twist, so make sure you tune in.

What else? T-Bone freaking spilled yet another beverage on Gyro's carpet. Duck Sauce bought doughnuts. Biscuit was distracted from the game at hand by his own sketchbook and Chick-o-Sticks refused to get beer from the fridge for his colleagues. Americano just kind of did his own thing.

Gyro & the Zombietaur Barbarians of the Blood Lands

2011-08-20T16:41:00.007-04:00

There is a place in this world where the sky is blood red and no living thing can survive its harsh conditions known as the Blood Lands. In this place resides a most terrible and powerful necromancer. He has no name and surrounds himself with hordes of the summoned undead. This evil wizard is an undying lich that rends souls from their eternal rest and wills them to do his bidding. Much of which regards maintaining an ever watchful guard over his Skeletal Keep. A fortress constructed entirely of the skulls and bones of defeated heroes and monsters. From within he performs his darkest and most foul of magicks. From within he feels safe for only a fool would dare attempt an attack when his enemy is surrounded by an infinite pool of resurrectable minions. Safe until Gyro knocked upon his front gate...

As he crept up to towering gates of the Skeletal Keep, Gyro could feel the scrutinous gaze of the many undead eyes watching his every move. He gripped his sword tightly at the hilt and raised his fist to the door. Before he could rap his knuckles a second time against the bone-made barrier a small opening in the door slide away and was replaced with the unblinking attention of a pair of stern glowing eyes staring from behind. What the eyes belonged to Gyro could not tell. The beast was so large that all our hero could see was darkness within. The beast did speak, it only stared down at this unwanted visitor. Gyro thought for a moment, contemplating what he could say that would sway this guardian and allow him entrance inside.

No words came to mind though it did not matter. The creature met steel and groaned as Gyro's blade slid through bone to flesh and bone again. The shadowy figure's eyes birthed wide with shock and surprise. Soon after, a red mist began to fume from within the entrance. Gyro withdrew his weapon and jumped back and prepared himself. He knew this mist as the necromancers dark magicks wisping away from his dolls lifeless bodies looking for a new host. He heard the crumple of the guardian's mass hitting the ground within. He also heard the plodding thuds of what sounded like horse hooves barreling towards the other-side of the gate. He took another leap back as a group of massive beasts came crashing outward.

Before Gyro stood the Zombietaur Barbarians of the Blood Lands. These massive hulks are brutal blood-thirsty monsters that seek only to deliver the most heinous deaths to their enemies. Just one of these shaggy ogres could easily tear a human apart and at this moment Gyro was staring down four of the ugliest beings he had ever laid eyes upon. With the glint of flashing metal Gyro removed the head of the first barbarian. Red mist billowed from the monster's neck as the sword sliced another of the beasts in the midsection dropping it to its knees, mist escaping from the wound and vomit flowing from its throat. The remaining two zombietaurs raised their blunt chopping weapons and tore hoof to bone and gravel in Gyro's direction.

Unwavering, Gyro stood his ground and swiftly raised his blade before swinging it downward rending the first attacker fatally down the center. He effortlessly stepped to the side into a braced stance and firmly drove his free fist upward goring the last barbarian in the abdomen catching the monster's innards in his grasp. Gyro showed the beast its organs before the red mist clouded their view. As the death haze dissipated, Gyro's silhouette was seen disappearing into through the entrance to the Skeletal Keep as the opening was replaced with skull and bone and a mad man's cackle left breaking the eerie silence of the lifeless fortress.

Enjoy!

New Contest: You Could be the Next Winner!

2011-08-17T11:30:00.003-04:00

That's right, you, yes YOU! could be the next winner. I don't know how many contests we've had, but here's another one. How do you win? Easy, listen to the show, follow this blog, blah, blah, blah. No you don't even have to be a follower.

Remember our officially sanctioned and fully approved Minions Merchandise? The link is also on the right, as has been said time and time again, there is zero markup, we don't do this to make money. It's just nice to get the word out, besides it's a chance for you to get some cool artwork by host artist Bi3cuit.

Well head over to the shop, find something cool, just look around, and then you're automatically entered in the contest. It's that easy. It's a good shop, you'll find cool stuff, and the cheapest thing is a ten dollar coffee mug, the most expensive is a $24 dollar shirt (seen here). You have to drink stuff to live, why not in a Minions mug? You have to wear clothing in the elements, again, why not in a cool gamer's shirt? Of course, no purchase is necessary to win. Send us an email to say what you liked in the shop, what you bought if you did such a thing, what you might have bought, or what you would like to see added. That's all it takes.

During the next Deathwatch episode we will randomly draw a name from those who have entered and the winner shall receive:

A 40k Deathwatch Space Marine

That's right, and it won't be something already painted off the shelf either. It will be painted for you, from a space marine of the chapter of your choosing. You also get to pick whether it will be an Assault Marine, a Devastator Marine, or a Marine Librarian.

The contest concludes with the airing of the next Deathwatch podcast, so you only have a week or two left! Good luck, the Emperor protects (and gives away prizes)!

The Well-Read Minion

2011-08-09T11:42:00.009-04:00

National Public Radio recently held a contest for the best science-fiction and fantasy novels of all time. The site narrowed the list down to a mere 200, then invited viewers to vote for up to ten titles. The contest may still be going on, if you are interested.

“But T-bone,” you say. “The minions are sci-fi/ fantasy geeks that are always talking books on the podcast. What do you guys think are the best books?” “Excellent question,” I reply.

So I (T-Bone), Duck Sauce, Americano, Gyro, Pad Prick, Flounder, and Chico Stix all voted, then tallied up our votes to create a Minion’s top ten. Err...top forty.

As a disclaimer, we chose our books on personal preference, entertainment value, impact on the genre, or quality of writing. Thus, some are classics, and others are just fun reads. Not surprisingly, between 70 votes we picked 40 different books. Many of us did not have a one single book in common, which just shows how many great fantasy/sci-fi novels there were to choose from.

Our not-so-definitive list is…

5 votes:

Lord of the Rings Trilogy

4 Votes:

Starship Troopers
Ender’s Game

3 Votes:

Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy
1984
2001

2 Votes:

World War Z
Eisenhorn Omnibus
I Robot
Foundation Trilogy
Conan Series
Old Man’s War
The Forever War
The Stainless Steel Rat Books
The Stand
Hyperion Cantos
Caves of Steel

1 Vote:
The Riftwar Saga, Fahrenheit 451, The Belgariad, Dune Series, Drizzt Series, The Watchman, Xanth Series, Bridge of Birds, The Moon is a Harsh Mistress, Ringworld, Uplift Saga, Neuromancer, War of the Worlds, The Saint, The Diamond Age, The Deed of Paksenarion, Snow Crash, Childhood’s End, Chronicles of Amber, Martion Chronicles, Song of Ice and Fire, Chronicles of Tomas Covenant, Elric Saga, Silmarillion, Rendezvous with Rama, VALIS, Sandman Series.

Ducksauce & the Venomous Goozes of the Wailing Caverns

2011-08-06T17:08:00.007-04:00

The noxious slime that drips from the walls and ceilings is not a natural occurrence of the underground rivers far beneath the entrance to the Wailing Caverns but a warning to all those that dare delve into the darkness within. A warning slathered about by the venomous goozes deep inside. At least so says the old crone babbling to himself in the corner of the Boddington Tavern. Babbles which Ducksauce happened to hear while speed shooting a flagon of the local pub ale. Babbles which any normal barfly might consider crazy and more looney than the toothless bum spewing them. Babbles which Ducksauce took as a challenge...

The titled wails of the caverns are not gusts of trapped wind echoing off the walls but the death rattles of a thousand unlucky travelers finally escaping the mouth of this snaking deathtrap. At least that was the gist of what Ducksauce read from the plethora of signs and warnings staked about the gaping pit that is the doorway to the caverns below. With nay but a battle-worn axe and a hastened leap into the inky blackness he disappeared.

About a year later a young boy claims he saw a man wielding an axe emerge from a waterfall near a farming town about three villages to the east of the Wailing Caverns. A waterfall and water source that many months earlier had turned a viscus green hue and began to spout demonic spiked-bones and skulls. The farmers of the town feared the water lost to foul and evil magicks. However, after the man emerged, the water began to run clear once more and not-so-much as a whimper was heard from the caverns. The man disappeared into the forest and was never seen again.

The goozes of the caverns would consume any who neared their blind halls. Attracted to the heat of one's body these blobs would appear from all corners of the darkness. They would take in flesh, bone, leather, and steel and not a single item would be left behind. The only evidence that they had ever been there were the screams of terror left hanging in the air, trapped in the pitch black mazes of the dark dank earth. He dined on that very same slime and bone dust that would eat and eat all else until the earth shat him out. It is an arduous task to make and eat jello with just the spark of steel to wet stone to light your way. At least so says the old crone babbling to himself in the corner of the Boddington tavern...

Enjoy!

The Tale of Two Game Shops

2011-08-01T06:44:00.005-04:00

So Sunday, I go into a local game shop located in a shopping mall here in town. I often buy gaming supplies online, and I often feel a little guilty about it, so I decided to visit a real gaming shop.

I am dragging my 7-year old son by the arm, and carrying my one-year old daughter, both of whom are not excited to be there. I'm there for one specific thing - a card box for my son's Pokemon cards.

When I walk in, the two store employees are talking to each other. I say in a loud voice to my son that we will only be there a few minutes, as soon as I find the card boxes (plenty loud enough for the attendants to hear). They continue their conversation, oblivious to my presence.

I walk through the store, saying several times, loud enough for them to hear, what I am looking for. They continue to ignore me. I could have asked them, but I didn't. I went through a lot of trouble to physically drive to their store, wasting gas, with two annoyed children, just to buy something I could have bought online with a click of a button, and these gentlemen ignored me. So I left, deciding that this store did not deserve my business.

An hour later, I was on my way home (still with grumpy kids), and as an afterthought pulled into another game shop located downtown in the old district. I walk in, the employee immediately asks me if I need help, he gets the stuff I need, which involved climbing a ladder to a top shelf, and to boot, gives me a copy of the free Black Crusade adventure.

I ended up buying a couple of extra Pokemon packs from him.

Thunderstone!

2011-07-27T21:27:00.004-04:00

The Minions have heard that all the kids these days are using a newfangled form of communication called "video." To test the waters, we provide you with this.

T-Bone, Gyro, Mystery Meat and Chico Stix got together for a little Thunderstone last weekend, and recorded this highly-produced "Geekumentary" for your enjoyment.

So enjoy! Lest you wish the streets to flow deep with the blood of your children.

T-Bone & the Colossal Penguid of the North Pentagram

2011-07-26T17:42:00.008-04:00

Behold the massive beast known as the Penguid. Part giant penguin, part extra-large squid this gargantuan creature plagued the waters of the North Pentagram and was responsible for the disappearance of an unfathomable number of sea faring ships and their devoted crews. After a long arduous battle with just a rusty flail and the yearning for titan's blood, the great T-Bone felled the monster with a crushing blow to the side of its three-pronged beak and impaled it upon the shattered mast of a wrecked and long forgotten viking vessel.

To this day not a single ship sails the North Pentagram without the tale of T-Bone's feat upon the lips and ears of its crew. Some even claim that on rare storm-less nights you can hear the screams of the damned Penguid as it relives its own death night after night while others fear it is the cries of the tentacled younglings as they weep for their slaughtered mother and grow with revenge in their hearts.

As for T-Bone you say? He cares not for such tales as he is too busy venturing forth slaying much larger, and some smaller less important, creatures.

I figured I'd try something a little different this time around with the banners and focus on each member of the Minion crew. By the roll of a die T-Bone won the first rendering!

I Hope you Enjoy!

In His Wedding Suit

2011-07-19T21:54:00.002-04:00

Because I'm a complete knucklehead and posted the same art twice now, I thought I'd make it up to you and post another pic of some hosts. Namely me and Biscuit. You know, that guy who keeps drawing everything? As you can see, he cleans up rather well. He may be the youngest amongst our cadre, but now he joins the ranks of matrimony. On behalf of the rest of the Minions, let's wish him a hearty congratulations on getting married!

In His Birthday Suit

2011-07-18T20:46:00.003-04:00

A rare, de-robed look at the Monster Master himself...

New Banner Art - July 2011

2011-07-04T16:22:00.009-04:00

This one goes out to all those rock 'n roll cherubs out there...

Enjoy!

We're Aimin' to Misbehave

2011-07-02T18:49:00.000-04:00

Deathwatch 2.0 Powerpoint

2011-06-30T14:45:00.007-04:00

is for power pointing! Here it is, until someone makes us pull it down, a "powerful" presentation of the history of the Imperium, the Adeptus Astartes, and the Deathwatch! Great for explaining to your wife, boss, kids, friend, mom, dad, etc... about the fabulous world of 40K.

Download it here. (6MB)

Episode 33: Deathwatch v2.0, Game One

2011-06-25T18:15:00.000-04:00

Episode 33: Deathwatch v2.0, Game One
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Gyro, Biscuit, T-Bone, Americano, Chick-o-Sticks

It's the first game running Fantasy Flight's official rules for Deathwatch. This means lots of learning on the fly of course as none of our hosts read the rules prior to the game! Well, except for T-Bone, he was prepared. He even had a PowerPoint presentation.

Our heroes travel to a planet overrun by Tyranids. Their mission is to retrieve a valuable data core as well as the Mechanicus Magos who is protecting it before the planet is terminated under the Exterminatus doctrine. While they're dirtside they decide it's good to have goal and vow to also eliminate no less than eighty Tyranids before returning to base. While on the ground they assist an Imperial Guard commissar and also vow to get her off the planet.

Back in Black

2011-06-18T13:18:00.003-04:00

Tonight marks our second Deathwatch foray, this time using Fantasy Flight's core rules. T-Bone will handle the GM duties this time around instead of Duck Sauce. This is the game that will dovetail off episode 31's character creation.

Heavy Metal Action

2011-06-14T00:16:00.002-04:00

Above's an "action" shot of episode 32's game, the Fiasco Heavy Metal edition. It gives you a sense of the high-tech recording techniques we use and what's going down in the center of the table we all sit around.

Rock on.

Give Him Sechs!

2011-06-10T23:41:00.005-04:00

Bi3cuit comes through yet again. Since it's really not December anymore, the old banner had to go and the theme for the new one just had to be Blood Bowl!

Our Painsphere League has been gaining momentum for some time, so it was only natural that the hosts were paired up with their respective teams.

There's too much goodness to relate them all, but suffice it to say Bi3cuit's done another fine job of rocking the Wacom.

I chose Chick-o-Stick here because A) He actually doesn't play Blood Bowl, B) It's funny seeing him with a full head of long hair, and C) His little Elf chica there is hot, with some well placed jewels.

Feast or Famine

2011-06-08T10:13:00.001-04:00

Here's a teaser pic to get you through our podcasting doldrums...we'll be back soon

Smuggled Packets, From Our Colon to Yours

2011-05-06T07:57:00.000-04:00

We're not the fastest when it comes to shipping out fabulous cash and prizes...but rest assured they eventually do get shipped out! Here's the latest round of minis, ready to be smuggled through any lax, ahem, checkpoint.

Instead of swallowing these and hoping they don't rupture in my colon however I may just send them out priority mail. Besides, I don't know what a ruptured miniature might do to my innards and I don't want to risk finding out. All right Moe, check that mailbox and congrats again!

Everyone else stay tuned, you never know when we'll have the next contest (we never know either actually).

My Neighbor Cthulhu

2011-05-03T10:53:00.001-04:00

Since we're borrowing from other sites already, dovetailing off T-Bone's Great Old One reference ala Royal Wedding, I'm posting this joyful nugget of twistedness. Fans of Miyazaki and South Park alike rejoice!

On the Head of Princess Beatrice, Dead Cthulhu Waits Dreaming

2011-05-02T16:53:00.006-04:00

I wish I could take credit for this caption under the picture of Princess Beatrice at the royal wedding. Unfortunately, I can't .

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

Win early, Win often

2011-04-29T06:29:00.005-04:00

This is for Duck Sauce, who loves when I post videos to the blog!

Good job Biscuit! Those who haven't entered the Heroes of Armageddon contest, you are missing out. Get those entries in now!

Episode 32: Fiasco Heavy Metal

2011-04-22T02:16:00.003-04:00

Episode 32: Fiasco Heavy Metal
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Biscuit

Aaargh! Something happened to our original post with the write-up, show notes, and everything else. Thanks to Duck Sauce for pointing this out. It's completely gone I'm afraid. You'll have to make due with this cheap filler post, sorry everyone. If anybody does run across our original episode 32 post, just email it to us. Thanks!

Free Minis Giveaway Winner!

2011-04-19T18:57:00.001-04:00

In episode 31 we had an embedded, super-secret miniatures giveaway. Up for grabs are the five galactic hooligans you see above; 15mm Scourge models from Rebel Minis. The codeword for the contest was "Icehouse" and Moe came through like the wind.

"The sun hangs high in the sky and the ice house is slippery when wet."

So congratulations to Moe, and to anyone else who made it that far into the podcast (we'll get you a consolation prize Stewart). There will definitely be more giveaways in the future. Until then!

Episode 31: Deathwatch Character Creation

2011-04-18T18:44:00.001-04:00

Episode 31: Deathwatch Character Creation
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, T-Bone, Biscuit

Summer is right around the corner and so is a new RPG campaign. This time the hosts return to their roots and delve back into the 40k universe, now with a purpose-built a 40k rule-set. Trading in their investigatory longcoats and lasguns for power armor and bolters, Deathwatch has become their destination. Definitely more to come, enjoy!

Show Notes:

Our local Blood Bowl league, The Painsphere
The Dawn of War franchise
Organized Play, our FLGS
The Heroes of Armageddon Project
The 25mm Warrior
Dragon Age II
A New Minion, Jumbo Shrimp
A Free Minis Giveaway...and Winner: Moe!
The Latest Hyborean Hype
Our hometown of Santa Cruz, California
Mako
Deathwatch Character Creation

You've Seen the Art...Now Here's the Artist

2011-04-07T21:01:00.006-04:00

The Minions of the Monster Master are proud once again to claim one of their own as the visual powerhouse behind Santa Cruz Warhammer's most ambitious project to date; the Heroes of Armageddon. Promising to be no less than FOUR times more epic than the amazingly successful Storm Wardens project last year, the Heroes of Armageddon project is pulling out all of the stops. And Bi3cuit has once again been handed the reins to put the visual touches on what promises to be another memorable charity event.

Here's Bi3cuit's banner from last year's project, but it doesn't stop there. If you want good ole 40k imagery (with a helping of humor) look no further than our current blog banner above! Just strolling through the "ART" label below you'll see probably 90% of the work belongs to him as well. It's always good to have a 'doodler' in the gaming group to turn to for sketches, but to have someone of this kind of talent, well that's even rarer than having a good GM!

Episode 30: Fiasco in the Wild West

2011-03-12T10:39:00.003-05:00

Episode 30: Fiasco in the Wild West
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Flounder, Biscuit

Danger and intrigue abound deep in the Wild West. The hosts try a second helping of the new cooperative story-building role-playing game in Fiasco. This is becoming a favorite new ground for the intrepid hosts as they venture forth again into a Cohen Brothers-esque rpg with a tagline that reads, "With great ambition and poor impulse control." By direction of Duck Sauce, "no aliens, no robots, no monsters." By the end of the game, you've got one heck of a story too. Enjoy!

Show Notes:

Fiasco Actual Play RPG
More award-winning banter than you can shake a mule at

Episode 29: Fiasco in Antarctica

2011-01-23T09:55:00.001-05:00

Episode 29: Fiasco in Antarctica
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Americano, Biscuit

Danger and intrigue abound deep in Antarctica. The hosts try a new cooperative story-building role-playing game in Fiasco. This is definitely new ground for the intrepid hosts as they venture into a Cohen Brothers-esque modern rpg with a tagline that reads, "With great ambition and poor impulse control." By direction of Duck Sauce, "no aliens, no robots, no monsters." By the end of the game, you've got one heck of a story too. Enjoy!

Show Notes:

The Game of Thrones Franchise
Duck Sauce's FoW D-Day Stuff
Basing Tips for 15mm Troopers
Ascension, Pandemic, Small World
Film Documentaries
Netflix Selections for You
The Big Blue
More French Films for You
Being Human TV Remake
The IT Crowd
The Cape, worthy or not?
Old TV shows and their Remakes
Biscuit talks art
Gyro's lament for a slow 2011 start
Some 2010 Numbers in Review
True Grit remake
el Duderino
Cohen Brothers movies
Fiasco Actual Play RPG

His Dice Hate You as Well!

2011-01-19T19:06:00.004-05:00

You may remember the character BJ Hunnicut from the hit televison series M*A*S*H* set during the Korean War at a mobile army hospital. After the war BJ returned home and opened his own private practice. Actually, no, that was Trapper John, BJ died when his helicopter was gunned down as he was leaving the country.

Do you know why BJ died? Because his player rolled two natural ones in a row. The DM felt sorry for him and let him roll percentile dice, but BJ's player rolled a miserable 4%. The dice hated BJ, that's why that character died.

Meatball has dice. Meatball's dice hate him as well. His fortunes changed not so long ago when he snared first place in a Minions of the Monster Master contest. Out of over four hundred entries, Meatball (just BJ at the time) was victorious.

He won a zombie-portrait of himself from our own Biscuit. The two were able to trade recipes and antique cookware and Biscuit drew up some new banner artwork. This coincided with a total blog makeover and is also when BJ transformed into the entity now known as "Meatball". This is the first in a series of "Profiles in Minion Auxiliaries". Meatball is such an auxiliary, and should the Minions need, he is ready to be called up at a moment's notice, snakebite kit at the ready.

Go forth to his blog, check out his wonderful goulash, and partake in his members roll call by subscribing as a follower!

Episode 28: Holiday Around the Horn

2011-01-02T21:06:00.002-05:00

Episode 28: Three Hosts go Around the Horn for the Holidays
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, T-Bone, and Gyro

Duck Sauce and Gyro are joined intimately by T-Bone in this holiday special. These three stalwart gamers hang out and go around the horn for your listening pleasure. There's no actual play, just the three of them hanging out and shooting the breeze. It's an action-packed episode for not having any semblance of a plan, the topics are below, enjoy!

Show Notes:

All I want for Christmas is to serve the Emperor

2010-12-27T06:12:00.006-05:00

T-Bone got a Copy of Deathwatch for Christmas, which he is considering trading in for a copy of Legends of Anglerre. Then again....

What did you get in your stocking?

Biscuit's Weekly Art Posting 0023

2010-12-05T17:14:00.004-05:00

(pictured from left to right: Flounder, Americano, Chick O' Sticks, Lil' Gyro,

T-Bone, Ducksauce, Bi3cuit, Mystery Meat, and newly featured Pinto)

Happy Holidays from the

Minions of the Monster Master!

Episode 27: Fall-In! Convention Wrap-Up

2010-11-21T01:21:00.005-05:00

Episode 27: Fall-In! Convention Wrap-Up
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce and Gyro

Duck Sauce and Gyro. Gyro and Duck Sauce. These two stalwart Minions discuss, in depth, their experiences and the grandeur of this past Fall-In! gaming convention, all on the road trek back to the Minions lair. Within you'll find day-by-day discussion of the games they played, the games they loved, the food they ate, the stuff they saw, the people they hung out with, and so much more. So check out this episode, it's chock full of gaming goodness and the usual banter you've come to love. Having listened to it already I gotta say it's "not too shabby"!

Show Notes:

Biscuit's Weekly Art Posting 0022

2010-11-07T23:06:00.004-05:00

It looks like another minion fell to the ever-growing Zed army.

Congratulations again BJ! Enjoy.

What is best in life?

2010-11-07T22:23:00.004-05:00

To listen to Conan the Barbarian: The Musical!

Episode 26: Oblivion's Edge in FATE

2010-11-02T00:50:00.000-04:00

Episode 26: Oblivion's Edge in FATE
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Biscuit, Americano, Chico-Stix, and T-Bone

Lock and load those bolters! Our Deathwatch Space Marines face the incoming Tyranid Hive Fleet only as defenders of the Imperium can do. Head on and grim.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 31

2010-10-31T18:34:00.007-04:00

On day thirty-one I dedicate this one to all the survivors of the Zompocalypse.

Congratulations!

Enjoy it while it lasts for you are truly

The Walking Dead

Enjoy the show tonight at 10/9c on AMC. I hope everyone enjoyed this past thirty-one days as much as I have. There were many many zombie games and miniatures that did not make the cut and I appreciate that nobody called me out on that fact! If I had the time I would have loved to have been able to cover them all but hey, I'm only human; Right?

Oh right, I didn't make it...

(FYI I'm the one in the red hoodie)

...and with that I leave you with these upcoming zombie survivor figs that should be coming soon from Reaper Miniatures...

...and don't forget. That noise you heard? It's just the blood and guts garbled moan of a Zed creeping about in the shadows with his choice of which brain flavor he'd prefer next on his undead mind... Oh. Too late, he got you too...

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 30

2010-10-30T17:20:00.004-04:00

On day thirty this one goes out to all the ladies.

The Son of Yog-Sothoth from Tengu Models

might even give the Monster Master a run for his money.

This guy gives "F'ed in the A" a whole new meaning for me... I mean where the A on that thing? Where is the A?! Now if zombie mutations aren't your thing Tengu Models offers plenty of other minis to hopefully satiate that Zompocalypse craving of yours.

Check out this set titled "The Great Zedsby"

I also suggest checking out their set titled "No Time to Dress". For those zombies lucky enough to wake up in a cold lonely morgue with nothing but a toe tag to keep them warm...

... poor John and Jane Doe.

The Chimp of Judgment...

2010-10-30T08:29:00.005-04:00

...frowns upon the post-gaming shenanigans by Gyro and Duck Sauce.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 29

2010-10-29T20:25:00.002-04:00

On day twenty-nine I take one last jab at the Nazi Zombies

with another round of

Zombie Bombs

from Secrets of the Third Reich

by West Wind Productions.

Now these guys are not as super realized as their Incursion birthed Bomberzombie brethren but these guys have a more grounded realistic take on the same subject matter. A zombie that explodes. There is no better kind if you ask me.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 28

2010-10-29T19:58:00.002-04:00

On day twenty-eight the world comes to an end. Again...

What could be worse than a plague of zombies?

How about an invasion of martians?

Martians that get attacked by zombies?

And then said martians become

Zombie Martians?!

Live out the dream of a modern era science fiction mash-up with these figs from Flying Frog Productions. Got a handful of players? I suggest a Last Night on Earth power play of humans versus Zombies versus Martians! The only thing its missing is Zombie Sasquatch.

Duck Sauce and Gyro Reporting In

2010-10-29T17:26:00.003-04:00

Foiled by the auto-timer!

Fall-In! Continues on and our intrepid hosts buckle down for another evening of gaming, socializing, and imbibing. More detailed wrap-up to follow on the next episode.

Now We Can Claim We're "Award Winning"!

2010-10-28T07:28:00.004-04:00

Sci-Fi Media, explorers of all things science fiction, just awarded us Minions with the annual "Your Blog Horrifies Me" Halloween award! This is in no small part of course to Host Biscuit's stalwart task to daily count down Halloween and the Walking Dead television show.

So, rock on to those guys (and to us to an extent) and you can bet next time we're on the air, you can be assured we'll graciously accept this and not flaunt it at all!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 27

2010-10-27T23:19:00.002-04:00

On day twenty-seven it's brain-munching terror on the high seas with

Black Scorpion Library's line of Undead Pirates.

Prepare to be boarded and don't forget that crucial double tap rule while you're reloading your flintlock pistol. Send those bastards back to Davy Jones' Locker with a lead pill-sized anti-depressant to the head!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 26

2010-10-26T18:38:00.002-04:00

On day twenty-six

that zany zed-head Hitler returns

with all of his zombified world leader buddies.

Grab a clip and get to it with Blue Moon's

Box 10 "I Just Can't Seem to Get a Good Night's Sleep" Zombie Characters Set.

My favorite has to be good Ol' Roosevelt

not letting that wheel chair keep him from getting his chomp on.

I hope your house has a handicap-accessible entrance...

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 25

2010-10-25T22:02:00.005-04:00

It's day twenty-five and the Old West just got a whole lot more dangerous.

with the Undead Nightmare expansion for

Red Dead Redemption from Rockstar Games.

Undead Nightmare will not actually be released until tomorrow but it can only be pure gold. Red Dead Redemption is such a phenomenal game on its own that adding zombies to it can only result in me having to change into a cleaner, and looser, pair of pants.

In Red Dead Redemption you play as John Marston; a notorious outlaw given a chance to live the good life if he is able to bring down the other members of his former gang. In true Rockstar fashion you're given free roaming capabilities of a sandbox western to make questionable decisions of a moral nature. You've also got a horse and a bevy of weapons at your disposal to track down bounties, aid the local law enforcement, hunt for buried treasures, and hunt wildlife.

Undead Nightmare adds a new stand-alone campaign and plenty of quests to explore. There are new foes in the forms of different types of zombies. You've got all the stereotypical zombies present in traditional western garb; you've got the regular slowbies, the runners, the slow-but-tough big guys, and the acrid spitting Zed's that launch vial vomit attacks. You might might even catch and undead cougar or bear lurking around... You even get to pimp your ride Zompocalypse-style with any one of the four horses of the apocalypse, each with their own trademark awesomeness. But wait theres more! You say you want some zombie bait to lure them deadheads out into the open? Check your bag. You want holy water grenades? You got it. How about a weapon that shoots bits of zombies at other zombies? It's there too. You can actually scavenge the corpses of all your hard earned headshots for chunks and pieces to jam down into a blunderbuss to headshot some more Z's.

Join me tomorrow in pulling up a stagecoach and raining some lead on the recently risen.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 24

2010-10-24T19:41:00.002-04:00

On day twenty-four I took a detour... heh, I rhymed.

I figured I'd mix things up a little bit,

plus I really wanted to draw something...

What if...

Mouseguard during a Zompocalypse?

Okay. As for the Burning Wheel rules system, we here at Minions of the Monster Master didn't much care for them. BUT! The Mouseguard universe, created by David Peterson, is so rife with possibility and gaming opportunities that it shouldn't be passed up!! What if the Z-Virus struck the territories? How would the hallowed walls of Lockhaven hold up? Would the guards-mice answer the call to duty? I DON'T KNOW! Besides look at Gurney up there. He seems to be doing well. Mystery Meat's character obviously didn't fair so well. Tenderpaws...

BONUS!

"Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This... is my boomstick! The twelve-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right, this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about a hundred and nine, ninety five. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You got that?"

*First guest to post a message on who said this famous quote might just get a zombi-minionized pic of them self!*

(*Note* Any posts made by members of the DMC do not count.)

Heart of a Champion! Building Kick!

2010-10-24T11:27:00.002-04:00

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 23

2010-10-23T18:09:00.004-04:00

It's high noon on day twenty-three and the

Zombie Gunfighters

from Wargames Foundry

are a hungry...

These guys would be a hoot and a holler in a round of Gutshot. Can you draw faster than a Zed?

Yes.

Yes you can...

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 22

2010-10-23T18:02:00.003-04:00

Oh snap! Someone left Sparky behind on day twenty-two.

Zombie Chihuahua

from the Malifaux game

by Wyrd Miniatures

This guy puts a whole new seriousness to the term ankle-biter. The Zombie Chihuahua is a small figure but it has some nice detail. This model will definitely add some quirkiness and stagger the conventional idea of what a zombie horde should consist of.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 21

2010-10-21T16:54:00.003-04:00

Its day twenty-one and as of course with any Zompocalypse, your house is under attack.

Good thing you've got a few plays of

Plants VS. Zombies by PopCap Games

under your belt... right? Right?!

Uh-Oh...

Good thing you've got this post and hopefully you took a

4-H Horticulture class in high school, right?...

F'.

This is complex stuff people! Okay. Good thing you get to enjoy the ride to hell with this game clenched in your cold dead fingers. The game mechanics are simple; strategically place plants about your yard, pool, roof, where-have-you to ward off incoming waves of zombies. As the battle of fauna versus the undead wages on you'll be privy to special tools and plants to compete against the zombie side's own increasing specialties. To quote one of the game's hilarious, at least to me, one-liners; "Get ready to soil your plants!"

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 20

2010-10-20T17:41:00.003-04:00

Its day twenty and this ain't Williamette Mall.

Its Fortune City and you've just hit sequel country with

Dead Rising 2

again from Capcom.

If you haven't guessed by now Frank West did not stop the zombie plague by solving the conspiracy behind the origin. He was just a photo-journalist. What did you expect?... Currently the Z-virus has run rampant about the world and taken it's toll. There are now "safe" cities in which citizens can live without fear of those pesky flesh-munchers. Safe is such an unstable word, especially in the Zombpocalypse. Its inevitable that your safety will become compromised. All of Frank's hard earned work was not for nothing though. Mr. West and Isabella Keyes, a femme fatale from the first game, have worked steadfast in creating a cure for the zombie, spread by bee?, virus in the form of Zombrex. Okay its not a cure but more of a preventative medicine. If you've been bit it will abate the spread the of the virus. Zombrex plays a big part in this sequel.

In Dead Rising 2 it is five years later and you play as Chuck Greene, a contestant on the very popular television show, Terror is Reality. A show in which zombies are the fodder of the will of the contestants to maim, humiliate, and just plain destroy while restrained only by the rules set of the game you are playing. It all has a very American Gladiators feel to it. Think, the ending of Shaun of the Dead. However, Chuck's celebrity as a veteran contestant is rattled as an explosion rips open a hole in the outer perimeter and guess what? There is footage of Greene planting the bomb! Of course we all know he didn't do it. I mean, come on. He's the hero of the story! The problem is he must venture out onto the zombie infested Fortune City strip to prove his innocence. The zombies aren't the overall problem however. Chuck has a daughter, Katey, and once upon a not-so-happy time she was bit by a damned Zed. She survived but must take Zombrex every so often. This is how the time driven storyline is enforced as you must find Zombrex and be back to Katey by a specific time to administer the medication all the while saving survivors, fighting those pesky psychopaths, and completing the main storyline if you so choose.

All the innovative game mechanics are back and mostly in a bigger and better way. Survivors have improved so much from the first game in that they are not as bad of a hinderance. Of course you have to struggle with the timeline and if there is enough time to save everyone but this time around the AI is smarter. This is in regards to characters not getting hung up or attacked so easily. Survivors have gotten alot better at defending themselves too. Another improvement is the weapon system. Yes, everything is still a weapon and all your favorite classics are still around somewhere. This time though; you can combine weapons! Got a bat and some nails? How about a spiked-club to bash though undead brains about? Got some extra jewelry and a flashlight? Light-sword. This time it is a real weapon, and a nice nod to the original, and not just a toy laying about the Play Palace.

Dead Rising this time around is also co-op allowing for you and up to three buddies to run around Fortune City and cause some improvised weaponed mayhem online. There is also a nice Terror is Reality set of mini-games for those looking for some online competitive play. The mini-games are worth a few runs as they are pretty off the wall and zany while being quite fun.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 19

2010-10-19T19:44:00.003-04:00

Tired of zombie miniatures yet?

Well I'm not! Its day nineteen. Check out these

Undead Zombies

from Mantic Games.

The sprues Mantic has to offer showcase some great variety compared to other sets available. There is a newly awakened Zed bursting from the ground, a few headless moaners, and even one that is just some legs and a spinal cord... okay, I don't know how those last ones work out exactly but I don't care. They are just plain awesome! The poses of all the other zombies reaching and groping over each other just scream their inner yearning of that sweet tasty gray matter.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 18

2010-10-18T22:17:00.003-04:00

Its day eighteen.

I have no witty remarks on how to segue into this article

because I'm staring at an F'ing Mouse with a chainsaw!

The image is of a Mousling Zombie 3-Pack exclusive

from Reaper Miniatures

and it is only available October 23-24

at the Reaper Artist Conference.

Minions Road Trip...Fall-In!

2010-10-17T19:34:00.002-04:00

Going to Fall-In! this year? So are we! Contact us through email or leave a comment here and we'll share a pint! Duck Sauce and myself, Gyro, will be there and we may just do some on-the-spot reporting from the front lines!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 17

2010-10-17T18:08:00.003-04:00

On day seventeen Zed just wants a hug... KABOOM!

No more man-love embraces, sorry Gyro, when the

Bomberzombies

from

Incursion/Grindhouse Games

are around.

What's not to love about a zombie carting an F'ing naval mine around in his pelvic girdle?! Just thinking about one of these bad-asses barreling down on his enemy makes me all warm and tingly inside. Incursion's other zombie minis aren't to be taken lightly either; but lets be honest. After a Bomberzombie hits your front lines you're gonna wish you perished in the explosion rather than just losing your legs so you have to crawl away in agonizing despair as a Sturmzombie comes at you like you were the last bit of tasty flesh on the battlefield. Kick those gushing nubs!!! Hey look. Another Bomberzombie...

Let's hug it out bitch.

The Ladies Love a Big Trident...

2010-10-16T17:41:00.002-04:00

...and Capsize has a sizeable trident indeed!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 16

2010-10-16T14:58:00.004-04:00

On day sixteen I was totally blown away when I came across these fiendish

Zombie Mobs by Studio Miniatures.

The images I have displayed are just a couple of the packs Studio Miniatures has available. They even have the zombified cast of Scrubs! The icing on the cake for me is the Zed still stuck in the body bag. HAH! There is so much detail in these guys that it is so hard for me to pick my favorite. How about the zombie going commando under his bath robe? The hand-walking torso? Santa, Rudolph and his elves?? I mean come on. There are some choice figs in this line-up and their survivors aren't bad either. I love the zany modern take of the grouping Dorothy and the Gang. There is no place like home indeed!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 15

2010-10-15T20:17:00.002-04:00

Ripped right out of the pages from Pinto's playbook.

You arrive at day fifteen with a PSP and

Age of Zombies from Halfbrick Games.

You play as Barry Steakfries, a man with a gun and a thirst only quenched by the splattered brains of as many zombies as possible. Oh and you're yoinked about through time and forced to tackle the undead denizens of whichever time period you land in! Each era you arrive in has its own array of brain-cravers ranging from a big ole' undead T-Rex to those unruly zombie gangsters; F prohibition! You've got a pistol full of unlimited ammo and there is always a shotgun laying around somewhere. Its the Zompocalypse, there are always plenty of shotguns...

Age of Zombies is a fun little game for just five bucks and is a great go-to game when you've got some time, and some zombies, to kill.

Episode 25: Sarterra Roleplaying Session 1

2010-10-14T23:56:00.008-04:00

Episode 25: Sarterra Roleplaying Session 1
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Biscuit, Flounder, Pinto, and Gyro

After a year in the making the world of Sarterra, an arduous task in and of itself. After many, many character creation sessions, more than I can recall in any other character creation process, we have our first RPG session in our lovingly crafted world. Using the FATE system has been most rewarding and we continue to use this story-based, player interactive set of rules to flesh out our adventures. So, come join a Fire Giant of Djinn blood, an Undead Wraith well versed in the Necromantic arts, a Water Elemental Genasi who is both skilled in song and harp and wields a ancient trident, and a human of the Averni nation, both and charismatic, a natural team leader.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 14

2010-10-14T21:05:00.004-04:00

We revisit Games-Workshop on day fourteen

to check out their shambling Zombie Horde.

No adventurer is safe with these guys roaming about. No dungeon without a distant moan of insatiable hunger. No village un-plagued. These guys are definitely an option for any fantasy tabletop skirmish of the undead-kind. Each box is littered with miniature assembling goodness and allow for each horde that much needed variety that their soulless taste buds just will not quench. Flesh is flesh... stupid zombies; you can't polish a turd! Field these guys and their flesh-bag opponents will be wetting their armours and weeping into their griffons' manes; cursing the gods that they have to war against and inevitably succumb to such an all-consuming threat.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 13

2010-10-13T17:39:00.002-04:00

On day thirteen. Its the Apocalypse!!!

Okay, its not really the Apocalypse but

Zombie Apocalypse

from Konami Digital Entertainment

offers a preview of what is to come to satiate your curiosity.

To start off Zombie Apocalypse is very similar to my last post, I Made a Game with Zombies in it!!! 1, minus the catchy song. However this rendition of zombie-killing mayhem has far better graphics and actually has environment-specific gameplay. No matter which of the seven levels you are playing in you can make the most of your designated arena. Say your at the airport.

I'm at the airport.

There is a helicopter ready for lift-off and its blades are dangerously close to turning you into a fashionable two-piece. You successfully navigate your character into a safer position, but wait! OH NO! The horde of zombies that were trailing you are now also in danger of the whirling blades. F'em. Sit back, blast away at some other Z-bags and watch as that flying machine rips them to shreds. That is just one example of the environmentally based death traps that await those that are too ill-fated, or better yet too mindless, to avoid these pitfalls littered about the levels. You also have an arsenal of eleven kill-implicated weapons to put to good use. And when those run out of fuel, ammo, finger-clicking-enthusiasm, or etcetera? Well, your base weapon is gassed-up-and-ready-to-go-F'ing chainsaw!

This game is a good play, downloadable through Playstation Network and/or Xbox Live and available for a ten-spot. If that seems like a lot, you will not be missing much if you decide to pass on this game, but, if you've got Alexander Hamilton sitting in your pocket and ready to go for a good romp of killing some Zeds you shornt be disappointed.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 12

2010-10-13T17:17:00.002-04:00

On day twelve we delve into the super realistic environmentally immersive... just kidding.

I present to you I MAED A GAM3 W1TH ZOMBIES 1N IT!!! 1

from developer Jamezila available on Xbox Live.

This game is a great throw back to the old school topdown shooters. You and up to three other friends can take on the hordes of the undead. The zombies arrive from off screen in increasingly difficult waves as you run about your television screen picking up weapon drops from the corpses of the fallen. This style game has definitely been done before but what it lacks in originality it more than makes up for with style. As you take on many various and hideous creatures you get to rock out to almost fourteen minutes of a song about the game. Sync the song up with mobs of zombies, flashy colors, and backdrop changes and you've got yourself a good game to kill some time with, and it's only a dollar!

Episode 24: Oblivion's Edge, now with more FATE

2010-10-12T21:35:00.004-04:00

Episode 24: Oblivion's Edge with FATE
RSS Feed Located Here

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro, Chick-o-Sticks, Mystery Meat, T-Bone

Episode 24 sees us back in familiar 40k territory but with unfamiliar rules that make their Minions debut. Following up on the Bolterpalooza episodes, the Minions play Fantasy Flight's second adventure, Oblivion's Edge. This time around however it's the FATE engine that's under the hood.

So let's get down to business. Alien crushing, bolter firing, power fist punching, praising the Emperor business. The heroes may have eliminated the Genestealer threat by exterminating the Brood Lord and putting down the local rebellion, but now the shadow of Hive Fleet Dagon casts its shroud over the planet. Huge bio-organic drop pods hit dirtside, spewing forth chitinous terrors. The locals are on the menu. Guess who just came to dinner.

We follow up on Bolterpalooza episodes #1 and #2 with the sequel, Oblivion's Edge. Turning things a tad on their ear however, we eschew Fantasy Flight's system altogether and substitute it for Starblazer Adventures powered by the FATE engine. All the usual Minions zaniness applies within, so kick back, reload your bolter, and enjoy.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 11

2010-10-11T19:47:00.002-04:00

On day eleven the town of Woodenvale will be the unfortunate victim to a plague of un-death. For the citizens of Woodenvale this could be their Last Night on Earth. I know… a way too obvious pun but it is too good of a segue to pass up! Flying Frog Productions offers up a great and easy-to-learn board game that I recommend to any zombie gaming enthusiast.

You start off the game by randomly generating the portion of Woodenvale you will be playing in. You also get to randomly pick which four of the eight main characters you will be playing as. Of course you can knowingly pick which town pieces to play on and which characters you want to play as most. But the randomness, I think, adds to the suspense of the game.

The objective of the game really depends on the particular scenario you will be playing but each session you play will track its progress via a countdown to dawn system. On the zombie player’s turn the marker will move forward a notch. I like this approach as it adds a sense of urgency to fending off the ever-tightening gap between you and the Zeds and completing the main objective.

The game also uses a card system with which each turn the zombie player draws up to a hand of four. The heroes however have to search the buildings in town to draw their cards. Each card has the potential to stick it to the other player be it as item/stat enhancing cards for the heroes or cards that likewise augment zombie movement/attacks but also have the potential to restrict heroes from entering buildings and/or adding more spawn locations.

Last Night on Earth really shines, like most games, in its cooperative play. The base game allows for two to six players and with more players comes more strategy. You still keep the four heroes and the same total of zombies but if you have three players you divide the zombies amongst two players. Six players give you two teams of zombies and four individual heroes. Basic math I know but if you throw in the cards you’re given a great opportunity for scheming and plotting. The best part though is that cards can be played, unless worded otherwise, at any time allowing for some great on the fly strategery.

The game however can be a bit pricey but it offers some great fun, it is easy to setup/cleanup, it only takes an hour/hour-and-a-half to play, and it comes with its own soundtrack. Yeah, it comes with a disc to play during each scenario!

Good luck citizens of Woodenvale, see you at dawn… or at least those of you that survive that long!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 10

2010-10-10T16:54:00.004-04:00

Oh that Hitler. He just can't take a hint. You would think after getting his comeuppance at the hands of the Bear Jew he would just stay dead. But what kind of world class villain would he be if he did? On day ten Hitler and his undead legion rise from the dead to unleash their undying prejudice on the living.

**(WARNING: the linked video is quite graphic; ENJOY)**

Reaper Miniatures looses the Zombie Nazis for World War Z

I can't say that I am as fond of historical miniatures gaming as I am of fantasy and horror. But throw these 28mm figures on the table and I will be at Gyro's house before the phone even hangs up! Reaper's zombie, or Kroid according to some of their links, models sport some great detail from the bullet hole in Hitler's (Hinzler's) noggin to the intestines spilling out of good ole' Hans' abdomen. Its time to kill some Nazis. Hey DONNY!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 09

2010-10-09T17:14:00.004-04:00

Its day nine. The weather is nice and breezy.

You decide to take a hike... straight to hell!

This Zombie Werewolf from Reaper Miniatures

is handing out one-way tickets to all-you-can-eat fleshie buffet.

And you thought Zombie Sasquatch was scary...

Every time I see this guy my thoughts are flooded with the images of the slaughter and blood-spilling chaos he, or she, would cause in a session of Fear & Faith. Not to mention seeing how it would fair against my mighty Were-Shark! This figure is full of so much win at such a great cost there are no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Fido is a must have for any outing in the darkly Z-infested unknown.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 08

2010-10-08T12:08:00.003-04:00

On day eight, the undead arrive in style.

The Corpse Cart from Games-Workshop.

This model is a stylin' ride led by a ghoulish taskmaster and pulled along by a foursome of weapon-limbed flesh-cravers. Add to that the harmonious bellows and screams coming from the heap of the gored and mindless zombies writhing about the spacious cargo-hold of the flatbed.

For me, aesthetically this is a must have piece for any tabletop zombie horde. The sprues, like with many of GW's models, bear many extra bits and pieces. You are given quite a few options of how to arrange the model so no two have the potential to be the same. You get a few variations as to the look of the ghoul and the mule zombies. You also get a couple options as to what kind of "weapon" you want to adorn upon the back of your "Death Wagon", as my fiance calls it. You have the choice of either the undead bale fire or a bell with which to summon the legions of the undead. There is a lot of detail on this army centerpiece and it can be fun to put together.

However I only recommend this model as a building endeavor to those that are willing to put in some slightly frustrated elbow grease. When I was assembling my Corpse Cart I had a hard time of getting the zombie pile and ghoul to fit into the bed of the wagon but with all said and done I am very pleased with the outcome.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 07

2010-10-07T17:52:00.004-04:00

These ain't no everyday zombies. No sir. These Zeds can run!

Day seven might be your last if your flashlight runs out of batteries

while playing this first-person shooter.

Left 4 Dead from Valve.

In Left 4 Dead, you play as one of four survivors looking to make it to safety and hopefully to a place where you will never have to see another damned zombie ever again. The main campaign can played through any of the five scenarios or "movies", complete with one sheets with your character's name on it. Each story has its own cutscenes and get-to-the-chopper type objective. As you bounce from safe-house to safe-house, arming yourself with some choice firearms and first-aid kits, you are swarmed with the hordes of the "Infected" as they come running from the shadows in all directions.

If that wasn't hard enough you also get the luxury of being attacked by the "Special Infected" that range from the hulking form of the Tank to the bloated rotgut that is the Boomer. Each special infected has their own... specialty. You will be exploded on, entangled in grossly misshapen appendages, vomited on, jumped on, stomped on, and spit on. Alot of these happenings are not as sexy as they sound by the way.

If you're a fan for multiplayer, which is where I think this game really begins to show it's fun,you should really enjoy the online features of this game. You not only get to play as the survivors but also the Infected as you try to take down your buddies as they make that last ditch effort to make it to helipad. And yes, by the "Infected", I mean you get to play as any of the Special Infected!

Please Remember.

You'll survive longer as a group, however, once you see that helicopter it is every last man/woman for themselves! Leave the children they'll just slow you down and it's okay to knock down a straggler or two... for the zombies. Never forget the zombies.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 06

2010-10-06T09:28:00.003-04:00

Day six and there are still plenty of Zombies brains to be splattered thanks to the Zombie Horde miniatures from Wargames Factory.

These guys are a great addition for any 28mm based tabletop gaming you may have planned. With this set you get plenty of variety to whip up a mob of 24 brain-craving-Zedheads. For each sprue you get six body casts, eight right arms, and nine different heads to mix around so almost no two zombies will be the same. The models are conveniently molded in hard plastic which allows for great customization possibilities as well. Your survivors won't be able to handle the onslaught these guys will bring on the table!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 05

2010-10-05T18:53:00.003-04:00

Day five but also March 30^th, 2010 for on this day I walk into Gyro’s basement (Man-Cave, Game Den, Dungeon of Forever Adventures, what-have-you) expecting to play anything, but, the best game EVER! At least for me anyways… I probably said, “this is awesome!” about a hundred times that night.

The game of such uber-ness? Fear & Faith by Ganesha Games.

By that time we had already played Songs of Blades and Heroes enough that it was, and still is, a great go-to-game for a tabletop miniatures fantasy game. But what about modern era? I really wanted to carve my niche in the group and I was wanting to do something with zombies and modern horror. That day it came at me like the horrible infection you would suffer when a crazy house-less guy, who later turned out to be a zombie came at you on your way home and bit you on the arm, in the form of Fear and Faith.

Fear & Faith takes the Songs of Blades and Heroes rules and adds the spice that makes modern horror such a fun genre to play in. It has just about every horror related goon you can think of. And if it doesn’t? Well Ganesha allows you to make up any creature you want with a nifty character/monster generator. It has vampires, it has werewolves, it has machete-wielding maniacs and best of all it has people… survivors really… for the hordes of zombies, the other guy fields, to snack on!

Fear and Faith is a very simple game to pick up and once you’ve run through it once or twice you’ll be a pro. This game utilizes a D6 based system and mechanically there are only really two stats you have to worry about. “Quality” and “Combat”.

“Quality” affects the overall ability to activate your characters. For each character you have on the field you can activate them, through a predetermined order, with the roll of one to three dice. This is a bit of a gamble depending on your characters’ quality score. Say you have a “Quality: 3” character, well you will need to roll a three or higher to successfully activate that character. The gamble is if you roll two or more dice and fail on two or more dice, your turn ends. So, if you roll two or more failures on your first character, your turn ends and you do no get an opportunity to activate your other characters.

“Combat” affects your fighting ability. If your character is engaged with a foe in hand-to-hand combat, each player involved rolls a die. You must both achieve your combat scores or better to successfully trade blows. If a figure fails his roll he is thrown to the fate of the dice roll. If his opponent rolled an even number he is knocked to the ground. Whereas with an odd number the figure is pushed back a base width away from his opponent. It is very quite simple and straightforward.

My likings for the mechanics are not what drew me to Fear and Faith however. Although easy and simple are a good prerequisite. The theme and overall feel I have while playing this game just sucks me right in. It’s AWESOME!

(Personal experiences of Fear and Faith may differ from game to game. Biscuit can not be held responsible if your love for this game does reach the level of awesome he has achieved.)

Episode 23: Bolterpalooza Follow Up

2010-10-04T21:23:00.006-04:00

Episode 23: Bolterpalooza Follow Up
RSS Feed Located Here

This one's been in the bag for about two months now, but just recently got posted, so here you go. All the usual Minions zaniness applies. Enjoy this follow-up to Bolterpalooza and wrap-up to the Final Sanction episode.

Hosts: Biscuit, Chick-o-sticks, Duck Sauce, Gyro, Mystery Meat, and T-Bone

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 04

2010-10-04T14:30:00.004-04:00

Day Four.

You’re in the Williamette Parkview Mall. Outside the barricaded entrances is a sea of zombies. Some might say you’re in a scene from a George A. Romero movie.

Capcom however says you’re playing Dead Rising.

You play as Frank West, an on-the-scene-photojournalist who has just stumbled upon the story of a lifetime. Williamette, Colorado has just had an outbreak of the undead and it is up to you to get to the bottom of this incredible scoop.

The main campaign is based on an in-game time clock where you’ll have to be at a certain location at a certain time to move the storyline forward, if you so choose. While playing through the game you’ll run across secondary objectives in the form of survivors who need saving and a few too many psychopaths who need killing which adds a nice diversion to the story. You can also level up along the way by taking down zombies and putting Frank’s career skills to use via taking photographs with his trusty camera. Each level grants you an increase in inventory capacity, health, and speed as well as a list of possible fighting skills to put to use. The game uses a sandbox style presentation allowing you to run about the mall at your leisure. Between timed cut scenes its open season for all zed-heads. Visit the restrooms for a quick save respite, and you can also visit many of the shops and eateries and browse their goods.

Did I mention that almost any item you find along the way is a weapon??

You’re in the ladies boutique. Look around you. You see a cash register, an ass-load of hangers, some purses, a mannequin, jewelry, and the list goes on. The point? All those items. They’re weapons! Grab that cash register and lob that mother at Zed’s face. I mean, who grabs the jewelry or purse? Okay. Maybe I did the first time I saw them just to see what they would do… but it was just a phase. I must say though that it did look great with that little flower print dress I yoinked from the mannequin just before sent it careening at a moaning mall cop.

Depending on the store you’re in you’ll obviously find area specific items that you can use to either fight, eat (to heal), and even wear. Some of which will end with humorous results.

There are a couple kinks in the game like illegible text, especially with lower standard television sets, and the time system is somewhat restricting. Although if you complete the game once you can come back for “Overtime Mode” which adds some extra fluff to the story or “72 Hour” mode where you can really let lose some aggression on the zombie folk in a no-story, no-holds-barred, battle royal. Neither of these issues are incredibly hampering nor zombie-killing-fun ruining factors to the overall experience I had in playing this gem from the makes of Resident Evil.

All in all, if you’ve got the gaming system and some extra expenditure capabilities I suggest giving Dead Rising a whirl. Speaking of whirl, I suggest checking out the linked video at time stamp 1:44.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 03

2010-10-03T16:26:00.002-04:00

Shotgunning into day three is

"Zombie (Action!) Cinema"

from Arkenstone Publishing

Zombie (Action!) Cinema is a game that is really, truly, actually limited only by your imagination. Each time you play the end result has great potential to be something totally different than where you started.

You can be a family man struggling to maintain his own inner battles whilst fighting to keep his family safe. You could be a quirky and ambitious civil-rights-for-zombies-activist and feminist defending the hordes of the life-challenged. You could be a mentally and physically handicapped pysch-ward patient who is just trying to bum a ride while at the same time evading the pursuit of the Men-in-Black and those damned undead Sasquatches!

*All actual characters from our sessions by the way...*

The game mechanics are actually really simple. You draw three cards that will determine your character archetype. Results will vary but may include any of those listed above. Your progress is tracked on a very simple board that ranges from no-threat-level-at-all to what's-up-Saint-Peter?-what-do-you-mean-I'm-not allowed-in??-Oh-right-the-sinning... No, those are not actually the naming conventions but seeing as Ducksauce is the owner of the game I had to come up something on the fly! Anyways... If you can make it off the board you survive. I don't think I have survived a round of Z(A!)C but win or lose this a game of great fun to be had.

Also of note, I thought that it was pretty neat that our very own Ducksauce and Gyro are listed in the links page of Arkenstone Publishing. See if you can find them!

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 02

2010-10-02T17:16:00.003-04:00

We kick off day two with a tile-laying-game from

Twilight Creations by the name of "Zombies!!!".

The objective? Survive long enough to make it to the helipad and get out of Dodge!

As the game progresses each player draws and places a city tile that increases the size of your gaming area along with the size of the zombie horde you have to face. Players can also draw up to three item cards which allow greater use of key-locations and varying effects of undead-kill-a-tude. Along the way players will collect and use health and bullet tokens as they trade blows with their undead nemeses.

There is also a second (sometimes easier) objective in which you may win by collecting a predetermined total of zombie kills, or "trophies" but I'm particularly keen to the helicopter scenario.

Its a fun little number to pull out for any occasion and has inspired many expansions (currently the toll is up to Zombies!!! 9) with different types of zombies ranging from undead dogs to clowns and babes. Each type of figure is also available in a super-government-enhanced-glow-in-the-dark version which has a slightly harder difficulty game mechanic. The game itself obviously comes with its own rules but part of the charm I have found while playing this game is how much fun it is to come up with your very own rules.

The popularity of Zombies!!! has even inspired theme changes in the form of Humans!!! and Martians!!!.

If you get the chance to play this game or any of its expansions I highly recommend giving it a try.

31 Days of the Walking Dead - Day 01

2010-10-01T13:57:00.004-04:00

Halloween is just around the corner and we all know what that means right?...

That's right! The Walking Dead will be premiering on

AMC, October 31, 2010, @ 10pm.

Being a big fan of The Walking Dead comic series and an even bigger fan of all things zombie (no pun intended) I figured why not celebrate by dedicating the entire month of October to the non-living flesh-craving over-eaters of the macabre and some of their better offerings to world in the form of gaming. Everyday until All-Hallows-Eve I will be presenting a new post relating to the appearance of Zombies in tabletop-gaming, video games, board-games, card games, and the like!

Enjoy and stay along for the ride as long as you can!

For in the Zompocalypse, there are no survivors, just more zombies.

Ian McKellen is One Bad Mammajamma

2010-09-20T16:36:00.004-04:00

This is at a gay pride parade. Earlier he had been wearing the stock "Some people are Gay, get over it" shirt. He replaced it with his own, specialized saying.

Biscuit's Weekly Art Posting 0021

2010-09-16T17:57:00.003-04:00

A little mood setting for this Saturday's game of Deathwatch.

The Eye Has It

2010-09-08T18:57:00.000-04:00

What you see above is the awesome shoulder pad of our upcoming Minions-themed Space Marine army, the Sons of Minos! Biscuit, as usual, did a great job of visualizing the shoulder insignia and John at Santa Cruz Warhammer took up the challenge to sculpt it on a tiny 6mm tall shoulder pad! John's a talented miniature artist, who does commissions ahem, and he's pretty much captured this perfectly. "Squidley" is what I believe he called the Monster Master icon, and I can't wait to get my brush on these! We had looked at doing custom waterslide transfers, but no, this is going to be so much better. If you haven't voted on a color scheme yet, do so now! John describes the whole process in this latest post, check it out.

Join the Minions Auxiliary!

2010-09-07T07:44:00.001-04:00

Way back in episode nine we interviewed game author Rucht Lilavivat. Episode nineteen saw us interview The 25mm Warrior while he gave us some great 40k information to boot, and in the episode before that, Eli gave us the lowdown on Gamestorm '10. Their valor has been recorded, and they have been given honorary Minion Axiliary status, ready to called upon at a moment's notice. Their humble abodes in the geek corner of the intarweb are located to the right under, appropriately enough, the "Auxiliary Minions" links.

So what do YOU have? If you've listened to the show you know we're all over the map. If you're up for submitting an article, or even in recording something to be used on-air, send us an email (which is also over on the right). As long as it's gaming related (or music, or food, or movies, or video games...) we're pretty much open to any ideas you may have. Enjoy!

Minions Themed Space Marine Army

2010-09-06T12:20:00.004-04:00

There's a new Space Marine Chapter in town, and you can help decide on their color scheme! Head over to Mik's Minis and cast your vote today, there's ten armor schemes to choose from. This chapter will be a Minions of the Monster Master themed army and we're pulling out all the stops on this one, including (hopefully) custom sculpted tentacled shoulder pads!

Head over today and cast your vote!

Episode 22: Book 2, Episode 2 with 2 Hosts

2010-09-04T02:45:00.007-04:00

Episode 22: Book 2, Episode 2
http://www.cowell.org/~andy/motmm/64k-podcast.rss

Hosts: Duck Sauce, Gyro

This episode brought to you by the number two.
Show Notes:

Around the Horn
A Game of Thrones
Game of Thrones Minis
The Legends of Anglerre
The Swords of Algiers
FATE System
Fractal Mathematics
The World of Sarterra
Future Fantasy Campaign
Clambake's Free Gifts
Wonton's Minionized Portrait
Bagel's Forgotten Name
The Barter Bucket
Lord of the Rings Strategy Rules
"Minions" Themed Space Marine plans
80gb iPod Classic...for $80 bucks
The Sword: Warp Riders
Movie: The Last Airbender
Movie: Toy Story 3

Clambake's box 'o loot...